Footage has emerged of a teenage girl being forced into painful splits by her coach and teammates while she begs them to stop. Ally Wakefield from Denver in Colorado was one of eight cheerleaders attending a "cheer camp" for East High School in June who were filmed having their arms held up by felllow teammates while her coach, Ozell Williams, pushed on her shoulders to force her legs into a split. In the video the year-old, who is due to start at East High in September, is heard screaming "no I can't" and "please stop" repeatedly. He was pushing like with his other knee on my back to try to keep my posture straight. Her mother, Kirsten Wakefield, then sent an email to the assistant principal of the school with the video, writing that her daughter had injured her leg as a result of the incident. It is unclear what action the school took at the time but copies of the video showing other girls being forced into the same position, believed to have been recorded by other teammates, were sent anonymously to the news channel in August.
She provides therapy to people who struggle with addictions, mental health, and trauma in community health settings and private practice. There are 17 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
Explore this Article Understanding the Risks. Spanking Only as a Last Resort. Establishing the Rules. Allowing Consequences. Using Time Out with Preschoolers. Show 2 more Show less Tips and Warnings. Related Articles. Part 1 of Look at the laws in your country. Over 50 countries have banned the use of spanking, including spanking done by parents. Recognize that spanking is linked to worse behavior, not better.
More than 50 years of research have shown that spanking is linked to behavior problems getting worse, and an increased risk of mental health issues, anti-social behavior, and cognitive impairment later on. Recognize that the impacts of spanking can last into adulthood. Recognize that spanking may harm your relationship with your child. Research shows that spanking, just like other forms of violence, harms the parent-child bond. National Institutes of Health Go to source Your child may be less willing to ask you for advice about their problems.
They might start sneaking around behind your back, to avoid getting caught.
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Your child might think that you don't love them. They might avoid your presence, even joining after-school activities or staying with friends, because they feel safer around people who don't hit them. Your child may become less open and affectionate around you.
They may even start to fear you. Part 2 of Find a private area. Conducting this type of discipline in a private area preserves the dignity of your child and prevents unnecessary embarrassment. The focus should be on discipline and additional embarrassment for your child should be minimized.
Most experts are adamant that children should never be spanked under any circumstances. Nonetheless, some parents believe that spanking is the best way to get children to adhere to rules.
Therefore this method of discipline should be used sparingly and only to prevent your child from engaging in dangerous activities. Be sure that siblings and other children are not present during the spanking. If a spanking occurs in a public place you should take your child to a private area away from onlookers.
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It is important that your child understands why they are being disciplined so that they learn what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Try to use all discipline, including spankings, as a teaching opportunity and not just punishment. Be sure to use clear age-appropriate language that your child understands when you explain the consequence.
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For example, you could say, "Donnie, you were running through the house with the scissors and almost ran into your brother. I have already given you a warning about this behavior so now it is time for a spanking. Allow younger children to lie across your lap with their bottom facing up.
This position allows you to spank the child appropriately without causing injury. However, older children may stand up facing forward. Make sure that your child is fully clothed during spankings. Spankings on bare skin can cause bruising and other avoidable injuries.
Pat your child on the backside. Be sure to use an open hand and use limited force. Pats should never leave any bruising or marks of any kind. Objects should never be used to spank your child and you should limit spankings to approximately three to four pats on the backside. Never spank your child when you are angry.
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Any spankings should be done when you are calm. This will help you avoid unintentional injury. Allow your child to return to their normal routine. When the spanking concludes your child will likely be upset. For example, you could say, "I know that you are upset. When you are ready you can come back downstairs. Part 3 of Decide on the family rules. Make sure that you and your spouse or any co-parents in the home are in agreement with the rules. It is very important everyone is on the same page with discipline so that your children are unable to split or divide parents and caretakers.
You can include your children in making some of the rules. If the caregiver is unable or unwilling to adhere to your behavioral expectations with your child, then you should consider putting your child in the care of someone whose parenting beliefs better align with yours.
Explain the rules to your children. Make sure that the rules are explained when your children are calm and be sure to use language that they can easily understand. Trying to explain your expectations when your child is upset or tired will not really be helpful. You should be calm and well rested when having this discussion as well. Make sure that the rules are concrete and specific so that there is no room for misinterpretation. Try not to only discuss rules after one is broken. Instead, explain them in advance, even if it means repeating yourself.
Try to word rules in an affirmative manner. Enforce the rules consistently. Be consistent with the rules so that your children can clearly understand them. If you only enforce rules sporadically then you will confuse your children.
This confusion will make it difficult for them to clearly understand your expectations and boundaries.
Jan 29, How to Include Spanking in Child Discipline. Effective discipline is when a parent or caretaker is able to shape a child's actions to create desirable behavior. The focus of any disciplinary action should be on creating order and promoting 52%(66). She started to cry on the set, and when the photographer complained to our agents, the agency hastily discounted the model's fee. I would like to tell you that this day was unusual. But events Author: Meredith Wright. Inside this room is a beautiful, freckle-nosed five-year-old named Indianna Swift. Indianna, relaxed and smiling, is still in her nightwear - a pink onesie - but her hair looks ready for the.
Avoid arguments with your children about the rules. No, this does not mean to give in to their every whim. Instead, it means to avoid going getting into no-win arguments with your child. The rule is still valid but you have removed yourself from the argument. It minimizes the power struggle and helps to make it clear that the rule stands.
Part 4 of Reinforce positive behavior. Decide what behaviors you want to see more of in your child and reward that behavior. Your child is not born knowing what he should or should not do. Rewarding positive behavior with positive consequences is actually more effective than having to implement negative consequences for misbehavior. Rewards for positive behavior should be consistent with the actual behavior.
Verbal praise usually works well for most positive behavior whereas larger rewards should be reserved for more significant milestones. For example, straight As on a report card may warrant a celebratory dinner out. You could also use a token system to reinforce positive behavior. A token system is when your child can earn points or small tokens for appropriate behavior throughout the week.
At the end of the week, he can trade in the tokens or cash in the points for a larger reward.
Ignore annoying behaviors or habits that are not harmful to your child or others. When you take away the attention from the negative behavior then he no longer has an audience. Often this process will reduce the undesirable behavior and increase desirable behavior. Instead, wait until he is calm and is engaging in appropriate behavior before you respond to his requests. Only ignore behavior that poses no harm to your child or other people. Identify the reason for any misbehavior.
There will be times when your child acts out.
Most acting out behavior is normal and developmentally appropriate. If you can figure out why your child is misbehaving, then you may be able to prevent future misconduct.
Keep in mind that there are generally four reasons that a child may misbehave: to feel a sense of power, because he feels inadequate, to get attention, or to get revenge. For example, he could start having more choice about what to wear to school or what to have for breakfast. Attention seeking behavior can be easily remedied by giving your child plenty of attention and praise when he is engaged in appropriate behavior.
If your child is seeking revenge, sitting down and having an age-appropriate conversation about how to better manage his anger is important. However, it is not okay to punch anyone. Instead, use your words and come talk to me or your dad about it. Decide if a natural consequence is appropriate. For example, the natural consequence that occurs when your son does not put his dirty uniform into the hamper is that his uniform is dirty on game day. If the natural consequence is appropriate, then allow your child to experience that consequence.
Sometimes they are the best teachers. Natural consequences should ONLY be used if the child is not in danger of being harmed. For example, you would not want to allow your toddler to touch a hot stove. The natural consequence would be that your child is burned and that is never appropriate. After the natural consequence occurs, be sure to have a conversation with your child about why it happened. For example, you could say "Jon, you did not put your clothes in the hamper so now your uniform is not clean for today's game.
Decide on a logical consequence.
Bond girl Lea Seydoux tells fans they will cry at the next movie No Time To Die which is full of 'emotion' and 'very moving' Film opens later this year. tbh im so tired of this while 'maintaining manhood' crap anyway boys friends f.r.i.e.n.d.s affection love friendship cuddling hugs cute beautiful empowerment let boys be feminine let boys wear makeup let boys cry let boys be human!!! fullbodyhug fullbodyhug ideas mine thea. Nov 30, How to Give a Spanking. In an ideal world, spanking would never happen. However, some parents feel that on rare occasions it may be necessary to smack their child's bottom. This article does not intend to either promote or discourage 43%(75).
If a natural consequence is not appropriate, then implementing a logical consequence is the next step. The most effective logical consequences should be related to the behavior. Also, the consequence should not be overly punitive nor should it be so minor that the child is unaffected.
Worse, if I do not see it, I may accidentally run over it. The next time that I see your bike lying in the driveway, I will be putting it in the garage and you will not be able to ride on it for 2 days.
However, your room must be clean before you go. How are you going to replace it? The spokesman said: "The CPS has advised the Metropolitan Police that proceedings should not be brought against the Saatchi Gallery over photographs exhibited in the gallery.
A spokesman for the gallery said that the two artists and staff at the gallery were delighted with the CPS decision. We are extremely grateful to the public and press who have supported the artists and the gallery.
A Scotland Yard spokesman said it remained the police's responsibility to act on complaints from the public, particularly in relation to children. No comments have so far been submitted.
Why not be the first to send us your thoughts, or debate this issue live on our message boards. Art gallery can show pictures of naked children A gallery was today told it could continue to display controversial photographs of naked children without fear of police prosecution despite claims the exhibition is obscene. The majority were taken by Ms Gearon of her own children. Share or comment on this article:.
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